Monday 28 November 2011

Something to watch; Halie's secrets video

I came across this video on Halie and Contessa's website and I've posted it because I think it silently says VOLUMES.

Have a watch and have a read of their site.

Bullying is not acceptable! Think before you speak.

Click here for Halie's secrets video about being burned

Click here for Halie and Contessa's website F**K yeah burn survivors

Halie talking about being a burn survivor

Halie talking about her 'burn-iversary'

Spa.....ahhhhh!

For anyone recovering from an accident I would recommend going to a spa. In fact, I'd recommend it to anyone, recovering or not!

I went to Lifehouse in Frinton.



The Magic Faraway Tree!

Lifehouse has 130 acres of Enid Blyton style gardens...just beautiful. Miniature waterfalls, Harry Potter style whomping willows and lakes upon lakes of lilly-strewn waters. At this time of year the trees shone with russets, mahogany and golds. The mossy grass was thick with crispy leaves and crunchy with pine cones. Here and there were clumps of toadstools; almost complete with fairies!



Treatments

My man had a back massage and facial which, although a little girlie, he enjoyed. Although this came with the package as standard, they changed mine to a 'fabulous pins' treatment. And it was fabulous!

I had my legs massaged and exfoliated and then my scalp massaged; it was wonderful. The therapist said my little toe was 'crunchy' and asked if the burn was on my right shoulder...which it is! She said this was showing up in my feet and recommended reflexology. If you go to a spa I would definitely suggest asking for a treatment that is entirely suitable for you and your current injuries rather than adapting a treatment and trying to avoid areas. Otherwise it won't be relaxing as you will be worrying that you might get caught in a sensitive area.

Swimming

I found this more difficult than I thought I would initially and didn't go in on the first day. When I got back to the room I had a comment from http://www.esthersabetpour.com/ and it made me feel completely differently. Her photography really reveals what it is like to be in our situation. Esther has a beautiful face and body, albeit some areas now different to the ones she was born with. Her comment came at just the right time for me, thank you!

I strutted my stuff around the poolside, went in the jacuzzi (top half out because of the heat) and didn't shy away at all. I was surprised to find people barely looked at me. A couple of people glanced across me but didn't stare. All in all, it was a very positive experience.



And the rest...

The spa had several amazing massage chairs so even if you weren't scheduled in for a treatment you could go and get some relaxation. I also really enjoyed the meditation class that we took. I think I might look into this to help with my recovery.

I felt relaxed for the first time in a long time. Fantastic!

Tuesday 22 November 2011

It's been 4 months...

Doesn't time fly....(Thank God)

Since that terrible day, I have come so far. It's only been four months! So far I have gone from being unable to walk or so anything for myself to taking steps towards recovery.

Baring it all in the Swimming Pool...

I'm really looking forward to this week because I am going to a spa with my Man for 2 days. The Spa http://www.lifehouse.co.uk/ have been really accommodating, they changed the offered treatment to a 'Fabulous Pins' because I can't have upper body massages or facials.

The one thing that is a little nerve-racking is...SWIMMING.

I have bought a kaftan to wear over my bikini so that I am not entirely on show but when I decide to get in the pool I know people will have a look. It's natural for them to, after all, I look as though I have been in a terrible accident.

One of the reasons I have decided to brave it and not obsess (too much) is that I have a nice figure from miles of running and I have never been that self-conscious in swimwear. However, I know when I'm older and have had children or put on some weight, I will feel more self-conscious. People do. Surely, this feels the same as I do now? Although it's a different circumstance, it's similar to anyone with stretch-marks, cellulite or extra weight. They are all worrying that people might be looking at them and thinking they look less than perfect. Well, thanks to this accident I am less than perfect and at 26 years old I was going to start becoming less than perfect anyway. Goodbye twenties! A body well preserved probably hasn't experienced much (babies, red-wine, too much chocolate) and so has probably missed out in a roundabout way.

I don't intend to put up with rude people or 'starers,' (come on people, your brain controls your eyes dontcha know) but I don't see why I should hide myself away.
I am young, attractive and slightly less than perfect now but I don't think I should be made to feel ugly or freakish.

On the plus side...I am mostly looking forward to spending time with my Man and eating salted caramel ice-cream, the most delicious dessert that I rarely find on menus.

Wedding Dresses - Covered up Shoulders, arms, chest

The Year of the Engagement

This year or more precisely this month, I have seen a flurry of engagements happening among my social group. All very exciting, there is nothing better than a good wedding and seeing your friends-in-love get hitched. One of my girls invited me to go to a wedding dress fitting with her as she is not sure what type of dress she wants to go for. Who knew there were so many 'looks' for a bride? Elegant, glamourous, understated, pretty, romantic, classic, alternative...after the dress fitter had finished her list we couldn't remember where she had started. Then my friend pointed at a sparkly, lace number and said, 'that one.' Dress picking at it's most refined.

Looking at all the dresses made me realise I can't wear any of your average styles for at least 2 years, should I want to. The dresses left expanses of shoulders, chest, arms....all a no-no for me at the moment and possibly, let's face it, forever. Although extremely happy for my friend sweeping about in a dress of epic corsetry, the only sweep for me was the one of frustration and angst that came over me.

I decided to get to work on Google and see what I could find that would be suitable for someone with injuries on the upper parts of their body. I deduced that yes, there are dresses that are both pretty (elegant, understated, glamourous etc...!) and covered up. Most of the dresses I have featured in the following post are not entirely suitable for me, so a dress-maker would probably be needed to select and combine elements (start saving now!) But there is no realise why covered-up has to be boring or overly 'monarch' looking.

So, please see wedding dresses galore on the next post, all a bit unconventional but stunning. I have my eye on the entirely backless one with sleeves...

Thursday 17 November 2011

It's the small things that brighten your day.

Since my accident hair washing has become a time-consuming, arm-achingly slow chore.

It seems like such a small thing but people like me keep dry shampoo in business...it is simply too exhausting to keep washing your hair.

Luckily for me, I used to work in a hair salon 10 years ago and I made some wonderful friends. It's one of these friends, mentioned in an earlier post, who made a silk fringe out of my singed hair.

Today I popped in after they invited me for a hair wash...I washed it once this week and couldn't bear to do it again! No appointment necessary, just the promise of a wash and go, whenever it suited me. (And some lovely Moroccan oil too!)

I'd like to say thank-you to the salon for all the support and kind words since this has happened. It's generosity like this that makes the world keep turning.



P.S Just in case...it's invaluable! http://www.batistehair.co.uk/

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY MUM




HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM!

Carry on Doctor!

Yes we know you're busy and the NHS is over-stretched...but what's happened to bedside manner?

Doc: Hi, what can I do for you?

Me : Hi, I'm here to update my sick note, I had an accident in July?

Doc: Ok....

Me: Um....have you read about it? It happened on the 22nd July.

(Doc gets flustered now, starts scrolling manically through my notes, hovering around 22nd September)

Doc: Let me see, let me see. Nothing here. Um, 22nd, 22nd....nothing! There's nothing here.

Me: 22nd July....no...July, that's September.

(Still looking at September intently, as though it might spontaneously change into July)

Doc: No nothing here. So, what happened?

(I explain here, as briefly as possible. I don't mince my words. Doctor looks perturbed.)

Doc: Oh dear.

(Scrolls up...)

Doc: Oh, the 22nd July. I was looking at September. Sorry....



EVERY TIME!

I've been to the same practice numerous times and each time they haven't read my notes prior to my arrival. Each occasion I prompt them to do so and they spend a few essential minutes catching up with my distressing history. A couple of times, like today, they ask me to relive it.



At the moment people look very surprised, Doctor included, when I tell them what's happened. The make-up and the skillful dressing is working. I look 'normal.' I warn them if only they could see under the clothes...

Because I look 'normal,' people are not being very careful with what they say, such as Doctor this afternoon. I look ok, so I must be ok, right?

Apparently if you're traumatised, you should look traumatised. You shouldn't wear nice clothes, put make-up on and get on with business as usual. You should stop everything: cry a lot; wear a baggy tracksuit and stop washing your hair.

I have become a master of disguise. It is just that; a disguise. Under the disguise, I am a 26 year old who has had a disfiguring and traumatic accident.

Wednesday 16 November 2011

Tuesday 15 November 2011

The hardest step yet....

After all I've been through, I thought today would be easier. Just another small step on the path of recovery; going back to the site of the accident. However, I couldn't even go near the specific area. About three hours before I was due to leave, I begun to feel really sick. This isn't something that usually happens to me and I didn't realise I was going to be so stressed. Once I got in the car I had another mini-freak out; I had to wait until I was calm before I could leave.

At the site, I met one of my closest friends, who helped me with the situation. She was really supportive and she took me around. I couldn't stay too long, it was too much! So I then came home.

I don't want to go into lots of details about it this experience but I feel both proud of myself and completely drained. I underestimated how hard it would be. If you are going back to a location then make sure you take someone very supportive with you and choose your time wisely.

Now, I am going to sit and watch T.V and have a glass of red wine. (And a pint of water to balance it out!)

Monday 14 November 2011

To anyone choosing compression vest colours....

Just a quick note...

I choose to have my first compression vest made in a nude as I thought it would look less conspicuous under clothes. (I was basing this on my experience of nude underwear. Logical, right?) What a mistake! The neckline shows under anything but a roll-neck so I have to wear scarves. If anyone gets a glimpse it really looks like the medical accessory it is. Compression vest choice - FAIL!

I ordered my second vest in black, with black stitching. From now on I will order black, perhaps one white for lighter clothes. The black blends in with your neckline and just looks like an undershirt. If you let it show, it just looks like part of your outfit.

Gym bunny

Keeping fit is important. It should be an integral part of people's lives. Despite this it's often the one thing that slips off the agenda because people are too busy. Or, they are so unfit they don't know where to start! I am convinced that one of the reasons my body has been able to cope as it has with this accident, my 'setback,' is because I was already quite fit. Although it's still been devastating and I've been very tired, I think I would have found myself struggling even more should I have not maintained my fitness over the years.

Enjoying exercise is both positive and negative after an accident. Of course it's good for you, it will help you to rehabilitate, build up your stamina, keep you upbeat and help control your weight while you aren't leading your normal day-to-day life. On the negative side, it is hard to accept that you can't do what you did before and that it's very easy to over-do it, therefore setting you back even more.

As I used to run several times a week and walk to and from work, I am feeling the cabin fever. Sitting and watching TV is a reward, if I've had a busy day. I find it hard to enjoy otherwise. For the first few months, all I could do was sit on the sofa. My only walking was going upstairs to lay down there instead! I haven't been able to do anything. After my skin graft I couldn't walk for several weeks. It really has been slow progress.

Still, progress has been made and I'm keen to build my stamina further. A few months back, I checked out the local gyms. I chose the most laid-back, relaxing gym in the area. It has a swimming pool which I hope to use once the rash has left the building and many classes. As it's more expensive, it has an older clientele. This works for me, as there are no 'pumping beats' and crazy weightlifters, just a very large, open gym in calming tones of blue and purple. If you're looking for a gym, ask if they have experience in accident or injury rehabilitation. This one does, so I feel much less self-conscious.

Initially I was convinced I would go everyday. I don't know what possessed me to the think this, probably because I would normally be able to manage it.

Firstly, I consulted a personal trainer. She was very nice but her overall advice was simple, 'listen to your body.' She said there would be no point in giving me a fitness plan in the early stages, as I was trying to build up stamina. She said they would push most people until they were worn out. With me, there would be no pushing, just gentle, regular exercise.

Most of this session was chatting, so I thought I was fine to go to Yoga the next day. Oh dear!

It was much too strenuous for me and although I took it very easy, I felt very light-headed. By the time I had got home, I wasn't feeling too great. By the evening, I felt terrible. My Mum came to get me and I went to the Doctors the next day and was prescribed...antibiotics for a kidney infection. No fun.

Obviously I had overdone it already! With Yoga? It just goes to show that you need to choose your classes wisely. I must admit, it has put me off going back. So I have been paying out for a very expensive membership that I have been ignoring! Until last week. It has been about a month since the kidney issue and my voice has returned, so I decided it was time to give it another go.

I did a Zumba class, as I love dancing and thought it would be uplifting too. You can do it at your own pace. Although it sounds more energetic than Yoga, I actually found it less of a strain. I told the instructor's about my position, so they wouldn't mind if I have to leave or go and have a little sit down. Zumba was excellent! I managed the class, although I drank a litre of water and had to really slow it down about halfway through. I took the rest of the day slowly and nothing bad happened! I was tired but I didn't feel poorly. A breakthrough!

I am definitely going again this week and hopefully it will be just as good. If you can afford it I would say joining a gym long-term is a good move. You might have to drive there and back even if it's close-by, in case you are too worn out to walk home.

Whatever you do, don't over-do it!

Friday 11 November 2011

A small step for most, a giant leap for PhoenixRising!

Today is a very significant day. I am going to meet some people who saw my accident. This is very brave of me because I hate people seeing me in vulnerable positions and I haven't seen them since it happened. But it is time!

SO

It actually went very well. People greeted me and asked me about how I was. I tried to give positive answers and summarise what has been happening and how I've been feeling. After all, I don't know these people really well. When people ask, 'how are you?' It is best to remember that this is a rhetorical question, a gesture of politeness. They don't want to hear your life story and the ins and outs of your day. Especially when most of your day revolves around what's on T.V.

If you start to complain about how depressed you are; you will feel more depressed! Best to focus on the positives, however small!

Slowly we all slipped back into the type of chat we would normally have, what people had been up to and what they were doing at the weekend. It felt as if nothing had ever happened. A very nice feeling! This is a strong step forward for me. The next step is going back to the site where it happened...next week. This is more of a worry for me, I don't know how I will feel.

A small step at a time....



An unusual saviour....

I originally used Salvon when someone dropped an WW1 steel trench helmet on my foot and ripped up my nail bed and I lost my toenail. (Are you squirming???)

It was incredibly sore and painful and I was worried about infection. I cleaned it twice a day with a Tesco antiseptic wipe and then put on Salvon and a bandage. Although it was sore for ages and ages, I didn't have any further issues.

So, as 'the rash' continues to live on, waving it's red flag of victory, I decided to use exactly the same system that I used during the toenail situation. As it is only a 'staph' rash, basically disrupted, upset skin, Salvon seemed the perfect solution.

Twice a day, I've been washing the affected area, using a Tesco antiseptic wipe and a thin layer of Salvon.

Despite the 6 topical creams and 3 lots of antibiotics...it is an off the shelf antiseptic cream that has had the most effect! The rash hasn't spread and it has gone down significantly. It is still there but it's not as angry and it even looks as though the patches might have shrunk a bit! I've been using it about 3 weeks, a reasonable length of time but it looks positive. So I shall continue!

I have also been putting it on my face, very thinly, especially on the angry part under my chin. It has made such a difference over the last few days.

Obviously, if you are going to use Salvon or any other cream you should be very careful because you don't want to have a reaction to it. Perhaps use it on a non-burned or irritated patch first to check you won't have any issues with it.

But.....YAY SALVON!


http://www.savlon.co.uk/products/antiseptic_cream.html

Monday 7 November 2011

RECOVERY - VERB - To return to a normal state of health, mind, or strength. To get back; to regain.

People ask me every day, 'how are you recovering?'

The word 'recovery' itself is a verb, an action but people use it as a passive term. I know people say silly things because they don't know what else to say but comments like 'it must get boring, sitting at home all day!' Make me realise they don't really understand what recovery is. And why would they? If I hadn't had an accident and be experiencing the recovery process then I would be the same!

It is a process, one of trial and error. It may appear you are sitting at home all day but really you are getting to grips with getting showered and dressed; then you're too tired to do anything else. It is a process of building up even the simplest of things.

The most difficult question about recovery is the one you ask yourself, every day. When will I feel normal again? When will I be 'recovered', emotionally and physically? Once the initial wounds are healed, especially the very visible ones, people begin to assume you are 'better.' You might go out and see people and they look at you differently now; you don't look ill or weak after all. They don't see you before you are 'disguised' though; they don't see you after the meeting when you have to lay down.

One of the most difficult things about a burn recovery is the time frame and the uncertainty. You break a leg, you're in plaster for X amount of months. You have a knee ligament operation, you rest for 6 weeks. With burns, no one will give you any answers. All skin is different. They will educate you in scar management and you do everything they say to help you minimise the damage. Until 2 years (the magic term) passes, they won't give you any other indication.

If, like me, you like being in control, this really is the pits! Having your body suddenly dictate what you can and can't do is difficult. This was a body that used to run several miles a week, who now feels tired after walking to the town centre and back. (I live in the town centre!) This was a mind of steel which suddenly feels fragile. This was a demeanor of ultimate control and professional conduct who now runs off if it see flames or hear fireworks.

To keep some control, I have kept several diaries. I have written a diary since the age of 5 and so I continue with that diary. I write this blog. I also have kept a diary purely of how I am feeling day to day and what I have done, very factual and medical. All these help me to look at the incident objectively, from a writer's perspective.

I have also kept a photo diary. Now this is really important. No one likes taking pictures of their injuries but it really does make you feel better to see improvements. My chest is still livid red. Yet looking at the photos you can see it used to be an open wound, it used to be a larger patch, 3 weeks ago it was even more livid red! It's hard to see it improving when you see it every day and photos really help with this. You can also show them to people who aren't sure why you still aren't at work...after all...you 'look ok.'

Another idea that has helped me has been organising my day so I am doing something every day. This has helped build up my stamina although it's trial and error; I sometimes massively over-estimate myself and suffer afterwards. It is also distracting to be doing things.

Choosing key dates and working towards them has been important. For example, I chose the date to come back to my flat and start to live independently. I did this a little too early and had to go home to my Mum's again for a week but the precedent had been set and I went back shortly after. I also chose a date to go to the gym again and a date to start seeing colleagues again. This way things are always moving forward. I couldn't do this initially when I was very sick but there came a time in the recovery process when this was a perfect technique. The dates are flexible, if they arrive and they haven't quite worked out, reschedule!

To all the people who are recovering; you must remember that this is your journey, your process and no one else has a say in it. Listen to opinions but know it is your body and your mind and you have the final decision. Do try and help yourself. My counsellor told me think about the advice I'd give my best friend in this situation; then take it myself. We are often kinder to our friends than ourselves.

One of the looming questions that hangs over us is, 'when will I be ready to work again?' I love my job, it is an all-encompassing job and many of my good friends come from work. Yet, despite this, I couldn't even think of work or consider coming back for many months. All of a sudden, one day, I found I had started to think about work. This was an important step in the process. Just thinking about it! I'm taking minute steps towards going back which to others might seem ridiculous but are very reassuring to me. I'm sure as time goes on I'll take bigger and more significant steps.

Despite all the knock-backs and irritations that I have faced and am facing during this process I try to be aware that it is a process. By definition, all processes have ends. The end of mine is what I focus on. The worst has happened to me now. Yes, I am going to have issues with scars and I am going to have emotional baggage collected along the way but like any nightmare, there is an end. Here's to recovery!

Sunday 6 November 2011

It's darker just before the dawn.

Revelations

Did my life flash before my eyes?

No.

Am I re-evaluating my life?

No.

Can I suddenly see how lucky I am?

Yes.

The greatest revelation has been just how much I love my life and the people in it. It has surprised me how proud I am of the life I have constructed for myself and the choices I have made to get here.

It sounds ridiculous and a bit short-sighted of me but I never really knew how important it was to have people around you that would do anything to make you feel better and look after you. I'm very lucky that these people extend not only to my family but to my man and my friends.

Most people talk about all the things they want to do after a 'close-call.' There are still lots of things I want to do but mostly there are things I'm glad I've done already. I'm glad I've chosen to take the opportunities that have come my way and made the most of my life everyday. I've chosen to surround myself by positive and lovely people, I strive to be the best at my job and I'm pleased with where it's taken me.

Of course there are some things that will be different for me now! I will always be more cautious. I don't like fireworks or bright flashes. I'm nervous of lifts, christmas lights and enclosed spaces and I dislike things that heat up: ovens; kettles; hairdryers; microwaves...I think I will always hate flames. No more cosy fires for me!

On a more personal note, I don't think I will waste as much time anymore. It has become more precious. I have always made decisions and changed things I don't like but I think now it will take me less time to get around to the right decision.

I think I am less likely to take things for granted. Examples would be my face, I used to complain a lot about my skin when really, it was lovely. I also complained about my figure, despite being fit and healthy from running a lot. Since having this accident, I am always going to feel kinder towards myself!

Of course I'm only human so I am sure I will become unappreciative again...sometime. But right now, I can appreciate the life I had and I want it back!

Wednesday 2 November 2011

How to make each day feel successful and productive.


Being at home, alone, can be depressing. If you would usually be at work, then you might find you have temporarily lost that sense of being productive. You are not socialising with anyone or exercising. You are probably, like me, very tired.

Depending on the stage of your recovery depends on what you can and should do. You shouldn't let anyone make you feel lazy if you need to rest or stay in bed all day. However, once you are at the stage that you can move around effectively and walk without support, you do need to be building up your life again.

Other people need to help you but you also need to help yourself. When I'm feeling useless and miserable I remind myself of this; if I don't help myself, nothing is going to change. The days will blur endlessly into one and I will lose sense of who I am.

I have come up with a plan to make my days feel effective and productive. It does vary and so will your plan but it gives me some control over the day-today happenings of my life. If I go out to an event (for example, my Mum's 50th) then I will have 3 days after it that I don't do much at all. I might not leave the sofa. This 'recovery' time is added into 'the plan.' I'm allowed to do it. It's not lazy, it's necessary and it's scheduled!

Having a routine really helps too. It helps you enjoy what you are doing instead of feeling you are being lazy or non-productive. An example would be watching a film. If I have planned it, I am not just lazing around watching TV. I am watching a film for a certain amount of time then I will switch activity. You don't get bored and glaze over. You can do a variety of things each day, look forward to them and enjoy them. It also seems to help my body expect what is coming next, making waking up and getting dressed easier and easier. Less of an effort!

Plan

1. Wake up at roughly the same time each day. For me, this has evened out about 9am.

2. I don't feel great when I wake up. Sometimes I feel downright rough! So I get my breakfast (usually toast or yogurt and cereal, not biscuits) and a cup of tea, grab my computer/a book and head back to bed. The key here is not to go back to sleep. If you get up and later find yourself tired, you can go and lie down. If you just keep turning over and going back to sleep there is a danger the day will vanish and you won't be able to sleep at night...so you'll be tired in the morning. Dangerous circle.

3. I get up NO LATER than 11am. This depends on the daily decision. If my show is good or I'm watching a couple of episodes then I don't rush myself...but I am aware that 11am is the time to get up.

4. I get ready. This can take 2 hours with the massaging and getting clean, the creams and the make-up. I only put the make-up on if I am going somewhere particular, if I'm going to the shops then I don't bother. It gives me spots! I do get dressed straight away and I try to wear something reasonably nice - not just tracksuit bottoms. It does make a big difference. I still choose comfortable clothes though, such as jeans and a jumper with a scarf or leggings and a jumper dress. Just don't dress like you are going to stay indoors and see no-one.

5. The Daily Decision
If I haven't scheduled in rest time, then I have to think about 'The Daily Decision.' I have created this to give my day purpose. It's normally in the afternoon when I'm at my best and I plan my week ahead on Sunday. It could be something fun or something that has to be done. Examples from this week and last week are:

*Spent 1 hour (give it a time limit initially so you don't overdo it) in the Supermarket getting food.

*Took myself to see 'The Lion King' in 3D at the cinema. (10 minute walk each way)

*Walked to the town to take my mail to the Post Office. (30 mins round trip - tiring!)

*Walked to Costa and had a coffee and read a magazine. (10 minute walk each way)

*Hoovered 3 of the rooms in the flat. (Again, overall time limit or prioritize rooms so you don't overdo it.)

Other things I do...walk to the shop and choose what shops I want to go to so I don't get too tired to get back, meet someone for lunch, clean the bathroom, go to the circus (!) invite someone over, go for a drive somewhere.

Next week I am considering going to the gym one day, for a specified time limit. Once my voice has returned fully!

6. Once you have completed your Daily Decision, whatever it may be, you've had a successful day! You might need to rest after it, you might need to lay down. You've done it though, you've been out, seen the world still at work, perhaps you spoke to someone (even ordering coffee counts!) or perhaps you completed a household chore that needed doing. Anyway, something got DONE. That's what counts! It makes a big difference to be able to answer the question, 'what did you do today?'

7. After you have spent a few weeks on the Daily Decision plan, you might feel ready to start splitting your day into chunks. Now I'm not sleeping so much, I have more time. In the morning I spend time until 11am catching up on TV shows my man hates, or perhaps reading. After that, I write a list of the things I would like to do or that need to get done today. I will usually complete at least two of them. Ideally three but it's not the end of the world if I can't make myself do more. This helps me keep on top of things like finances and other personal admin that doesn't stop just because you don't feel like it. I will usually do these after I have completed my Daily Decision.

The list isn't normally things that take physical effort but things that I have to push myself mentally to do. They are boring or I dislike doing them. I would dislike them normally but after an accident you do lose lots of your mojo. It makes it difficult to be productive. The less you do though; the less you want to do.

A couple of weeks ago the Daily Decision was enough for me. I'd come home and sleep. Now though, I am trying to get my stamina up and the list is a gentle way to help it improve!

After my Daily Decision is complete, I get a cup of tea, plonk myself on the sofa, a bit tired out and look at the list. If I was very tired, I'd turn on the TV and lay down, like I did after the Circus. Listen to your body! But say I feel O.K, just a normal (!) level of tiredness. I want to read a book and really enjoy it without feeling lazy or I want to watch 'Come Dine with Me.' So I look at my list and choose a couple of things to get done. for example: ring the tax office and order my contact lenses.

Today I was just too tired to go out. I went to the cinema yesterday and to the supermarket on Monday, so I just turned to my list. Today I called the dentist and booked my spa retreat. (It doesn't have to be all bad things, just things to do!) I put on some washing (so necessary!) and am writing this blog entry. After I have crossed these things off my list I will do absolutely nothing else.

Even without going out, I have got things done.

If you start with this simple plan:

1) Wake up and have breakfast.
2) Get up. (Different from waking up.)
3) Choose your Daily Decision (if you haven't already!) or look at your list. Choose to do one or the other. Only both if you're feeling up to it!
4) Get dressed.
5) Complete your Daily Decision or your list items.
6) Rest and do whatever you like!

You will find you can stay on top of things and break your day up. You won't need to plan in a lot as you will probably find that things take you much longer to complete as you are a bit out of tune with your body. Initially it is difficult to find activities...so I've suggested some below!

Don't overdo it, do a little at a time and take it from there. At the moment I am doing an Daily Decision that requires leaving the flat about three times a week. This just means I don't get cabin fever or get a bit weird sitting in with my own company day in, day out. The rest of the time it's things I can do from the sofa or small housework tasks.

Tomorrow I am driving to pick up my contact lenses, buying stamps and starting a story I've wanted to write for some time. These are my only tasks on the list but it gives me an aim to my day!

Don't just sit in watching Jeremy Kyle (unless you really love it...) Humans are sociable creatures who need purpose. Try to find things that you can do. If you are unable to walk unaided you might need to be selective about what you do, perhaps try splitting your time into manageable chunks in the day and switching activities every hour or two hours to stop yourself getting bored. Talk to your neighbours- maybe one nearby might pop over for coffee once a week? If you feel self-conscious because you can't cover your injuries (I'm lucky I can) perhaps take someone with you to begin with. The cinema in the day is a good activity as it is very quiet and dark, so you might prefer it.

Activities

If you want to stay in:

- Make yourself a really nice nutritious lunch
- Invite someone round
- Watch a film
- Choose a genre of books or author you have always wanted to read and start getting through them!
- Write a diary
- Write a blog (link mine to it!)
- Make a scrapbook
- Take up painting/sewing/knitting...
- Do some exercise indoors e.g. stretching
- Organise something (photos, wardrobe, herb shelf, alcohol cabinet, magazine collection, DVDs....)
- Phone someone up
- Start researching something you've always been interested in
- Internet shopping
- Forums
- A household chore (necessary and tiresome)
- Drawing
- Practise with your make-up
- Have a look in your wardrobe and choose what is good to wear these days (throw out or pack away things not suitable at the moment, you don't want to have to see them every day)


Going out, choose your times wisely so it is quieter for you:
- A walk!
- Cinema
- Garden centre (often do nice cream teas and are quiet and relaxing places)
- Massage on an area that is ok; for me reflexology is a good idea
- Gym (careful with this, don't do so much you can't get home)
- Get a coffee
- Buy a magazine or a book and go home to read it
- Meet someone for lunch
- Go to your local church cafe or service (even if you're not religious they are usually very welcoming and good company)
- Hairdressers (often will come to your house too)
- Supermarket (necessary and tiresome)
- Go to a charity shop and buy some books (usually small and friendly places)
- Local museum (likely to be quiet and reasonably empty unless you live in a Capital City)

Let me know in the comments box if you have any suggestions of things you like to do that might be added, especially things that don't cost a lot of money or are free.

Wise words from a housemate...

'Be loving and kind and it will be beautiful.'