Tact - not everyone has it!

TACT
n.

1. Acute sensitivity to what is proper and appropriate in dealing with others, including the ability to speak or act without offending.



It's a pretty important trait, tact.

If you have something a bit different about you, it's likely that people are going to say something Which is absolutely fine. What is not fine is the WAY some people chose to say it.

3 of my most cringe-worthy situations so far.

Supermarket Shocker

As a human, I have to eat. Sometimes you have to go out to get food. And people might see you. So I went to the supermarket, without my make-up on! Shock horror! Now, lets get this straight, my face is red in places but it's not grotesque. Yet the checkout lady gave me a good looking over and then said,

'what's that on your face?'

Me: 'errrrr....'

Her: 'Is it eczema? I've got eczema on my arm.'

Me: 'No, I had an accident.'

Her: 'What type of accident?'

Mum looks horrified and starts packing aggressively and shooting the checkout lady evil glares.

Me: 'Er, a burn accident.'

Her: 'Oh, I burnt myself the other day on the oven. It really hurt me. (Shows me a minisule burn on her arm.) I read in my magazine about proper burns and the things they have to do. Like when they clean them...'

Mum leans in and says borderline aggressively...'Will you please stop talking?'

Does she? No but she does veer slightly off the subject to a safer one.

Mum says, 'what is wrong with her?'

Me: 'She's just really thick. I feel sorry for her.'

Dustbin Man Div

For those out-of-the-UK readers, we recently had an indian summer. Temperatures reached over 35 degrees. (It does happen!) I ventured out very rarely because the heat played havoc with my injuries. One day, sun-creamed and parasoled up, I headed to the corner shop.

As I passed the Dustbin collectors, I could see they were going to say something. They were all men and they were all looking at me. Yes, I had a parasol but actually, it was very, very hot! So I didn't think it looked particularly out of place.

As I walked past him, the man said with a sneer over his wheelie-bin, 'too hot for you is it?' He didn't say it in a nice way, more like 'she's such a diva' way. I'm a good judge of intent.

Me: 'No, I've been in a chemical explosion actually.'

His face! To give him credit, he looked guilty and then was very nice.

Him: 'Can't you be in the sun then?'

Me: 'Nope.'

Him: 'Never?!'

Me: 'About 2 years.'

Him: 'At least it's only 2 years....I guess that's something.....'

Yes. Something really annoying!!!

Restaurant Man

Although this was fleeting, it made me laugh. The man in my life (best man ever, has been amazing throughout this ordeal) took me out to one of my favourite restaurants for dinner. It was lovely, the first time I have felt normal, mainly because of my make-up. It was the first meal I've really enjoyed because I was now off the painkillers that made food taste bland.

(In case you're interested: scallops, rare steak and salted caramel ice-cream.)

The man diagonally opposite me looked at my forearm, the only exposed part of me. It is fairly red but again, not grotesque. People notice it, I know this. I see them notice it and that is fine. They might even ask about it, fine. BUT there is no need to stare. You might glance twice. After that, you're staring. People don't like to be stared at!

So, after he had stared six times (I counted) for more than 5 seconds at a time, I decided to stop him. I stared at him back and waited for him to catch my eye by accident. He did and I didn't break my gaze. I stared unblinkingly; my scary teacher face. He went slightly red and turned his gaze back to his party of five, whom he should have been paying attention to in the first place.

MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Don't let people make you feel uncomfortable. If they want to ask you questions and they do it nicely, be generous. Educate them. But if they stare at you or treat you without tact, don't stand for it.

Use shock factor, 'I've been in a chemical explosion.'
Use assertiveness, 'Can you please stop talking now.'

Or stare back, like a hungry snake.

Seriously tired of being seriously tired.

I recently realised I had reverted back to my student routine, just without any of the fun. There's no going out, meeting in the pub, late nights, wine nights, great nights... but there is sleeping in until midday, unable to get up, headaches, voice loss, kidney infections and sitting around all day...eating. Gaining weight. Daytime TV. Afternoon naps.

I am seriously tired of being seriously tired.


Everything wears me out. If I plan an event, I have to plan to recover for the next three days. At least.

Here's an example.

At the weekend it was my Mum's 50th birthday; not an event I want to miss, recovering or not. It took several hours to get ready to go out in public. I dressed creatively to hide all my woes, with a high neck, long sleeve lace bodysuit under my dress. As it was a Murder Mystery dinner for Halloween, this didn't look out of place.

Neither did lots of gothic make-up, hiding a multitude of sins!

The night was great. I drank 4 litres of water during the evening, to offset my 2 glasses of wine. Despite this, by 10.30pm, I was losing my voice!

I croaked my way til midnight. The clock struck 12 and Cinderella turned back into Frankenstein. We stayed at the hotel so I didn't have to travel home and could touch up my make-up or go to bed early if I needed.

When I woke up, my voice was gone. All I could do was gasp like a fish!

It does feel like I'm being punished for trying to have any fun. I don't think I'm asking much these days. I'm not exactly dancing the night away, slamming down shots or going out night after night. I just want to be able to go to special events. So far I've tried a wedding (too much; got a kidney infection) and my Mum's birthday (voice loss.) Each event has been something I really don't want to miss, so I've put up with the consequences.

But I'm asking myself this...how long will it be before I can enjoy myself without any?

Remember, remember the 5th of November, fireworks, bonfires and accidents...

We all love loud, unpredictable explosions, don't we?


There is no reason why Fireworks Night can't be enjoyed by all. However, as someone on the receiving end of an explosion related accident, I can't help but stress that fireworks may be fun BUT they are also unpredictable, explosive devices.

A factsheet from the Child Accident Prevention Trust has some alarming statistics on it.

*Great Britain - in the four weeks surrounding Bonfire Night 2001, 1362 people
were treated in hospital casualty departments after an accident involving a
firework.

*685 children under 16 were treated in hospital for injuries caused by fireworks.

*Many more boys than girls were injured by fireworks– particularly in the 12 to 15 age group.

* Sparklers burn at a temperature of approx 2000 degrees! They cause a large number of accidents with young children being particularly at risk.

*Common injuries are to the hands (34%), face (12%), and eyes (17%)

*Over 60 per cent of injuries require ongoing treatment from a GP or hospital
and may leave permanent scarring.

Fireworks and bonfires must be treated sensibly and with caution. There is nothing wrong with being careful. It is not pathetic or silly. It takes seconds for an accident to happen and YEARS to heal from it.

There is a fireworks safety website but most of the advice found here are things you already know. They are common sense. Unfortunately, common sense evades some people.

1 Light sparklers one at a time and wear gloves, have a bucket of cold water to put them into, hot end first. Do not drop them on the ground. Do not pick up a sparkler from the ground.
2 Never give sparklers to a child under 5
3 Buy fireworks marked BS 7114
4 Keep fireworks in a closed box
5 Follow the instructions on each firework
6 Light them at arm’s length using a taper
7 Stand well back
8 Never go back to a lit firework
9 Never put fireworks in your pocket
10 Never throw fireworks
11 Keep pets indoors



Bonfire safety is also common sense.

*If, after careful consideration, you do decide to have a bonfire, make one person responsible for it, from early planning to final clearing up.Don’t site it too near your display or firework storage area.

*Never use flammable liquids like paraffin or petrol to get it going as this can result in uncontrolled spread of fire or explosion.
Check immediately before lighting that there’s no animal or even a young child hidden inside.

*Never put fireworks on a bonfire, even if they’re dud.

*Don’t burn dangerous rubbish (e.g. aerosols, paint tins or foam-filled furniture).
Remove any rubbish from your bonfire area in advance so there’s nothing that can be thrown onto the fire on the night.

So careful people, careful. Skin grafts are not fun.

Lecture over.


http://www.b48s.org.uk/downloads/safety/CAPT%20Firework%20Factsheet.pdf

http://www.fireworksafety.co.uk/

Safe firework fun, a cute site for kids. http://www.welephant.co.uk/bonfirestory000.htm

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/HomeAndCommunity/InYourHome/Escapingandrecoveringfromafire/DG_180786

http://www.fireservice.co.uk/safety/bonfires

Covering up burns, scars and scorch marks - a master of disguise for winter

Luckily, I am female. That means I have a plethora of fashionable clothes to choose from and several make-up choices at my disposal. Yes, it will take some time to adjust to high necked and long sleeves...but with internet research and free delivery, I can try them out in the safety of my own home.

I have always been more The Only Way Is Essex
than Made in Chelsea.

I am really reluctant to give up looking good, to cover up.

But then I thought...don't lots of people do this everyday???

I am one of the lucky few who loves the gym, enjoys running and likes eating healthily. As a consequence I (pre-accident) have a trim figure. Yet most people have bits they dislike: less-toned arms, post baby-stomach, chunky thighs. The key is not to think about covering up bits but exposing the best bits! Well, it made Gok Wan his fortune...

Scarves
Scarves are one of my new favourite things. They look excellent on men too. As winter is coming up in the UK, scarves are the perfect cover-up. Forever21 do an excellent, affordable collection. http://www.forever21.com/UK/Product/Category.aspx?br=f21&category=acc_scarf_gloves I have bought several and now have a huge range of colours and weights.

Jumpers
I've mostly found that plain jumpers with a contrasting coloured scarf swathed over the top looks the most appealing. Most jumpers, however chunky, usually don't go high enough up the neck. I have found some excellent ones from Primark at £5 each, so you can buy every colour. Alternatively, roll-necks work well. They are especially good to go under pretty tops that you want to wear but find an unsuitable shape.

Show your shape
If you have a nice figure, you can still show it off. There are a lot of long sleeve dresses, that combined with tights (if needed) or a scarf (if needed) would look very flattering. There is no need to wear shapeless clothes (unless of course you need to give your injury space. Then you should wear whatever is comfortable.)

Lace is also really fashionable at the moment which is perfect to hide discolourations of the skin. Just make sure the lace isn't too scratchy on sensitive skin.

Pussy bow dresses and blouses are also very popular at the moment and a godsend to the covered up look! They are flattering on most shapes although if you have a very big bust you might look better with layers of co-ordinating colour rather than a block colour across your chest.

Good underwear
Underwear can really help your outfit. I am having to wear a really good strapless bra, as I can't do straps. However, I have figured out I can have a strap on one side from the front, over the shoulder and attached to the opposite side at the back. This gives a bit more support. I am going to be wearing a lace bodysuit under quite a lot of my clothes. These are fashionable and cover up a world of issues! I washed mine first to help soften them. Search for bodysuits to find a selection.



Jewellery
Jewellery can be used as a focal point, to misdirect the gaze. I burnt my ear badly, so earrings are out for a couple of years. My right forearm is badly scorched but I can't always wear sleeves to the wrist! Instead I have been wearing a big bracelet and statement ring on my left arm. I have noticed that the person's gaze is drawn to my non-injured arm because of the bling! It's difficult but I'm practising gesticulating with my left arm too (I'm right-handed) to further minimise people noticing. Misdirection! It sounds silly but it works for Derren Brown!

Armery - Thanks Mary Portas!
Armery has been designed as a bingo-wing-holder-inner for ladies who want to wear sleeveless fashions. Indirectly, they are also a brilliant cover-up for anyone who has an injury on their arm! Lots of outfits I've found have high necks but are sleeveless and this will be just the thing to sort out that problem. You could also wear them under t-shirts, as they are quite discreet. http://www.mytights.com/gb/findit/mary-portas.html?limit=30&gclid=CMOM5eKLmKwCFYEZ4QodiggFPQ

Hair
If you can, get a good hair style. My hair burnt off quite badly at the front and I had to have the sides and some of the back shaved. I am aware I'm very lucky that I've got thick hair but I'm even luckier I have a good hairdresser. She came round to do my hair at home and she went through my injuries with me, to make sure she didn't catch me in the wrong places. I felt more comfortable this way. She cut me in a thick fringe to cover up all the lost, stumpy and spiky bits. She evened out the charcoaled ends. Already, it looked so much better. Next, I had a few packets of bleach to cover up my roots as I had to wear my hair up all the time.

Roll on 2 months and the fringe is long enough to brush to one side, reminiscent of my original side-sweep. I went to the salon for a full head of highlights and went bright, bright blonde! Doing this made me feel like I have more control over my appearance.

The only thing to be cautious of is colouring...if you have had a burn on or near your head you might want to avoid putting all over colour on these areas. Packets are much more controlled.

Make-up
If, like me, you are able to use camouflage make-up then work out what you want to highlight and what you want to disguise. I make my face a blank colour and then join up where the red patches are (under the make-up) with very pink blusher. This works because if the make-up comes off at all, the blusher helps blend the red patches together. I just look very flushed!

Another trick I am using is dark, smoky eyes. Lots of mascara, eyeliner etc. Then I cover my lips in the Dermablend concealer and white them out. This means you can't really see my blurred loss of lipline. I try to draw people to my big blonde hair and smoky eyes. Misdirection!

Lastly....

SMILE
No one wants to talk to angry looking, unsmiley people...well-dressed or not! You could look fabulous but if you aren't smiling, what's the point? You will find your own style again, it might take a while if you're on a budget like me or if you have a lot to heal up but you will look and feel fabulous again in time. It takes practise, perseverance and a positive attitude. Sometimes I look in the mirror and all I can see is graft, rash, red, red, RED! But then I remember it's early days and I get to work.

Skin irritations; how annoying!

A skin injury knocks your cells into a whirl. They are going crazy trying to repair you as best they can. The protective barrier has been breached! Man the trenches! Stop the bacteria!

Unfortunately this means you could be subject to skin infections, spots, boils, rashes (don't I know it!) itching, peeling, sensitivity, redness...basically the last thing you need after a stressful accident.

Rashes
Currently I am still suffering from 'the rash' and awaiting my acupuncture. In the meantime, I have been using Dermol to wash the area, followed by a delicate cleaning with Tesco antiseptic wipes and then a thin film of Savlon. I have to do something, as it has got increasingly worse since wearing my compression vest and I've been dislodging skin when pulling it on and off. This regime seems to have made it slightly less red in the 3 days I've been doing it...PLEASE let it work!

It's possible that you might contract rashes such as Impetigo because your skin has been knocked out of balance and bacteria can easily get into damaged skin. If you show any signs of rashes or weeping, do check with your doctor straight away and don't leave it.

Spots and boils
I was told by the Nurses that little blisters or spots sometimes come up on the damaged areas because of the constant massaging and creams clogging the skin. You also might find that the camouflage make-up gives you spots. I'm not sure if this is because it clogs your skin or because you rub it in and rub it to take it off. The Nurses told me not to pick them...if you can bear to leave them! Put some antiseptic on the area, especially if they do burst, you don't want the infection to spread.

The issue with picking things is that the skin is so delicate, it will simply break or go bright red and look worse. I had this problem under my chin. I decided not to touch it at all and to leave it as make-up free as possible for a week. I used this facewash twice a day. It's really gentle and doesn't dry your skin out. After several days (patience, patience, patience!) my skin has gone back down to semi-red instead of bright red.

Biotherm Magnesium Hydra-Mineral Cleanser Softening Mousse 150ml



Itching
A big issue with burn injuries is the itching that comes with them. My arm hasn't been too itchy actually, I think because the nerves aren't back yet. However, my chest is a different matter! The things I have to avoid are: any soap; any water; and try not to itch at all. If I itch even once, then I am going to be itchy for a while! One of the things you need to get prescribed is Diprobase cream. It leaves a layer of oil on the skin and stops the water evaporating. It must be applied regularly to work effectively, not just as a one-off when the itching starts. When you apply it be really gentle or it will aggravate you.



Peeling
The difficult thing about burns is that you must be really gentle with your skin, no vigorous rubbing, no direct water, lukewarm water only and so on. Despite this delicate touch, you can't leave dead or peeling skin. I made this mistake with my donor site. As it was so sore, I didn't like to scrub it in case it made it worse. Unfortunately, leaving it meant that scabs began to appear. Under the scabs, you can get infection. So I had to start massaging the area with Dermol and dislodging the dead skin. Gross but very important to note! Make sure that dead skin doesn't build up, as in the long term you will take longer to heal. Gentle, regular removal is the best way; don't make it sore. If you're not sure, speak to your GP or Nurse to make sure you are doing the best thing.

Cover up sun wear

Cover up sun wear by phoenixrisingfromtheashes featuring a heart umbrella

How to do covered up evening wear

How to do covered up evening wear by phoenixrisingfromtheashes featuring asos dresses

Massage - My experience on how to do it and what to use

Massage is really important to your recovery.

Massage helps rebuild the collagen in the skin, breaking down tough fibres. It also stimulates new tissue growth. Massage is important to decrease sensitivity in the tissue and stimulate damaged nerves. It also reduces pain and tightness in the scar. Scar massage will increase circulation in the area.

Dedicated scar massage will help the healing process in the scar and also help it to fade. There should be less redness and swelling. Massaging the scar reduces the chance of it contracting.

When I first had the bandages off my skin graft, I was horrified that I had to massage it. The procedure had only been done 7 days ago but the nurses pronounced it 'taken' and ready to massage. It looked like a shark bite and I felt a horrible sensation when it was touched. I was told that I needed to massage it four times a day. I was really nervous of doing this. I was told to use whatever cream I preferred as long as it was gentle or non-perfumed.

At first I cried every time I touched it. I really hated it. Mum and I took to calling it my 'pretty' skin graft and my 'clever' skin graft and tried to stroke it with love. After all, it had repaired painful and dangerous wounds on my arm.

I started off using E45 to massage my arm but I found it dried and left a white emulsion over my skin. I switched to Aqueous cream because of this, as it was little lighter it didn't leave the same residue. After about 4 weeks, once the skin had healed more and the stitches had come out, I switched to Bio-Oil.

My skin has changed colour rapidly. I don't know if this is because of the Bio-oil, the surgeon's skill or the dedication to massage early on. Some of the skin has already changed back to normal colour! Now I am in the compression vest flattening down the scars too, I am hoping it is going to look excellent in another 3 months.

I have lost the feeling in my arm in several large patches, due to nerve damage. All I have been able to feel is occasional stabbing, needling pains in my arm and mostly in my shoulder. However, recently, I have felt sensation in my grafts! I am hoping this is due to the massaging and that it means my nerves are growing back. My boyfriend is going to massage my grafts too shortly, to help me work out what I can feel and hopefully stimulate the nerves further. It might even be relaxing....we will see!

Obviously, everyone will be told how to massage their own injuries by their physio. Here are some things I have only recently discovered. Find somewhere warm if possible and keep as warm as possible overall. Your body has so much work to do healing you; you don't want to give it extra work, such as keeping you warm.

1. The massage must be firm. I didn't realise this to begin with and simply massaged the skin at top surface level. Your fingers should push very firmly on the skin and move in small circular movements. This will have the best results. Afterwards, you do feel better and more able to move!

2. Stretch! As my skin grafts are on my arm and shoulder, the physio had me lie on the bed with my arm stretched out whilst massaging. This helps keep the movement and helps keep the skin limber. It also meant the contracted tissue and scars were stretched out and then massaged at stretching point.

3. Don't rush it. This is a difficult one but I do try not to rush my massaging. I don't spend a really long time doing it, about 5-8 minutes a time but I do try to stretch it out at other times during the day. I would suggest that you do it as long as it feels ok. If it feels sensitive or sore then stop.

4. Blistering, spots and skin breakdown The physio said that I might experience blistering, spots or skin breakdown (i.e. small sores) If this happens, then I should just be gentle on that area. She said it might breakdown because of the firm massaging but that the massaging is more important.

It is so BORING massaging. I really find it a chore. Part of this is because the weather has turned cold and I hate taking off my clothes to do it. However, I know that it needs to be done if I want good results. If, like me, you are struggling with the commitment, think long term. I want to get as close to my pre-accident arm as possible with just a few scars for character.

Massage can also be used to treat pain and stress. It is worth looking into having a massage elsewhere on your body to help relax you and increase your well-being. When in hospital, my Mum gave me a foot massage twice a day and it was lovely to be touched and feel my body as a source of pleasure rather than the pain I was predominantly feeling. I am going to look into reflexology now I am home.

Further information can be read at this discussion forum http://www.katiepiperfoundation.org.uk/forum/#/discussion/44/creams-for-scars-and-burns

http://www.bio-oil.com/en-us/

Irrational fear and a trip to the Circus

I'd say I am a brave person. I wouldn't say I'm reckless but I'm fair game to give anything a go. I've been snorkelling with sharks, touring Greek islands on a moped and camping in the Outback with Kangaroos for company. I've tried surfing,kayaking, sailing, cave-walking, abseiling...anything that sounds a bit different...I'd probably try it.

Until now.

Now I am officially a wimp. This is what an accident can do to you. I fear the most simplest of things. Some of the things that make me flinch wouldn't have even crossed my mind before. They are day-to-day experiences and events. Yet all of a sudden, they hold fear in them. They could do wrong. They could be unpredictable. They could cause me an injury.

An example would be the cinema. It's a dark room, full of unknown people. I start to feel claustrophobic. I worry if something happened, it would be difficult to get out. I check the exits. The music is loud. It makes me jump. I don't know what's going to happen in the film, usually a plus point but all of a sudden, worrisome. Recently, I went to see a film and there was a sudden accident in it. It flashed out of nowhere and I wasn't expecting it. My heart stopped, my legs started shaking.

Another example would be yesterday's experience. My friends decided to take me to the local circus. Something a bit unusual, to break up the monotony of my day. After arriving, we shared a laugh about the fact we were the only people without hordes of kids with us. And I mean that...there were swarms of young children under 5. They were everywhere! I figured this was a good sign. How scary could a circus be?

Firstly, I worried about the tent, the 'big-top.' I checked out the poles and the ropes. If it collapsed it would be very stressful. It was quite a big tent, fairly busy in there for a Tuesday afternoon. Could I escape if necessary? I shelved this thought, quite aware I was acting a bit irrational.

Horses came galloping out in the ring which made me nervous. I stayed controlled though. The horses didn't look like they would stampede. They were very well trained. Next the camels! Enormous, grumpy looking creatures performing slow, regal circuits. I'd almost relaxed at this point.

Then, the Ringmaster cracked her whip and announced their crowning glory, the 'ONLY circus in the ENTIRE UK, to still have LIONS in their show. The ONLY circus to have them UNCAGED!'

I was off like a shot, running towards the exit. Who knew I was scared of lions and tigers and bears and things? Not me, that's for sure. I have never been scared of big cats but the promise of them roaming unpredictably, dangerously, toothily around the ring was all too much for me. I positioned myself at the exit...turned around... and imagine my embarrassment when a pack of dogs shaved to look like lions bounded out from the curtains and jumped on little blocks, tails wagging.

The 18 year-old, gum-chewing, synthetic-lashed attendant looked at me disdainfully and said, 'you do know they're not real lions, don't you?'

Actually, there were no lions. But there were tigers and I was ready for them. They were in a cage, all 5 of them and I strolled towards the exit for the duration of the act.

I had just reached my seat again when the clown pulled out something akin to a flaming torch. I totally freaked out this time and ran towards the exit. I thought he was going to start breathing fire. Actually, they were flimsy, flaming knives. All the children sat in their seats and watched whilst their parent's looked on in amusement as the twenty-something wimp ran off again.

The attendant, a guy this time, gestured to the several ancient looking fire-extinguishers and said, 'don't worry, we've got these handy.'

All in all, I would have enjoyed a circus before. It was quite a test, going and running off and coming back and running off again. My friends were very understanding and made me feel it was the right thing to do. I think that the way to cope with these irrational fears is to do this: put yourself in the position, as close as you think you can be. If it becomes too much, then move away. Otherwise, you would never do anything! I wouldn't use a hairdryer, in case it exploded. I would never charge my laptop, in case it overheated. I would certainly never use an oven, never get in a car, never go anywhere a bit different....

I'm pleased I managed the circus. We went for dinner afterwards and laughed about the attendant's comments and I felt much better.

Later on this week, I'm going to the cinema, to see 'The Lion King' in 3D.

Make-up lesson attended...useful advice issued!

I have been waiting for three months for my make-up lesson with the Red Cross, provided by the NHS but it was worth the wait! They had a range of brands to prescribe me and Dermablend was among them! I am very pleased about this as I am already used to this brand and it will be much cheaper obtaining it on prescription. The ladies were very nice and they took great care finding the correct colour to match my skin tone.

They applied the foundation, telling me to build up the colour and to not use too much. I was left with a very natural looking colour by the end, suitable for day-wear. Their aim was to cover the redness and scars with as little as possible but when I do it myself I would use more make-up as I am attempting to achieve as close to flawless skin as possible.

As a result they only prescribe the foundation or 'creme' as it is known and the fixing powder. In the day-time this would be fine but for nights out or special occasions I would still advise using the corrective concealer on the most vivid parts.

Although everything on my previous Dermablend post still stands, there are a couple of updates.

Applying the make-up

I have been using my fingers to apply the make-up but the ladies used a piece of natural sponge. You put the foundation or creme on the back of your hand and soften it using your fingers to warm it. You then dab the sponge on it firmly. Then you apply the make-up from the sponge to your face in a rolling action, again firmly. You wipe the sponge down each side of your nose. Then you use your fingers to blend or pat into pores.

The ladies started from the outside of my face and moved inwards but I would start from the middle of face such as the sides of your nose and move outwards. Otherwise you do end up with a tideline around your face!

The sponge does help with any uneven patches. I have an uneven area under my nose due to scar tissue there and it is easier to apply using a sponge than my fingers. It clogs a bit when fingers are used.

The sponge can be bought from most chemists and also the internet in several places. I will let you know once I've got some. http://www.anniqueuk.co.uk/facial-sponge-pack.html

The sponges should be washed in a mild detergent and rinsed well. Try to use something that won't irritate if residue does get left on such as shower gel or tea tree dilution.

Fixing powder

If fixed and set properly, the make-up should last for up to 12 hours on the face and 4 days on the body. It is also waterproof.

I was a bit suspicious of this claim. As I have oily skin, I do find that it becomes very shiny and I need to re-set the make-up using the fixing powder. For example, I went to a wedding from 2.30pm until midnight and I set it once in that time and could have done with setting it twice.

I also couldn't see how it would be waterproof.

The advice regarding fixing powder makes sense. You must powder your face LIBERALLY with powder, pressing it into your skin firmly. (Not too firmly - you don't want to dislodge the make-up.) Once powdered...go and do something else. You need to leave it on for 10 minutes or longer to achieve the 'fix.' Although the Dermablend products say 2 minutes, the ladies said this is in no way enough.

Eat your breakfast, watch some TV...but don't rush the fixing process!

Once ready, brush the excess off with a large brush.

The lady applied the fixing powder with a cotton wool pad but if it comes with a powder puff, you can use that. Whatever suits!

Removal

The final interesting piece of advice was removing the make-up......aqueous cream! Cheap and easily obtainable from any chemist or supermarket! Who would have thought?

Apply the cream using fingers and remove with a cotton pad. You might need to give it a few moments to loosen the make-up. Then rinse with water.

Thank you RED CROSS!

http://www.redcross.org.uk/What-we-do/Health-and-social-care/Social-support-in-the-UK/Skin-camouflage



Red Cross is a charity and their work is very important. If you would like to donate to them then please go to www.redcross.org.uk/Donate-Now

If you want to give something back or have skills that could be useful perhaps consider becoming a volunteer. http://www.redcross.org.uk/Get-involved

Removing Dermanblend make-up...a feat in itself!

As camouflage make-up is thicker and highly pigmented it is difficult to get off using conventional removers. With a combination of trial and error and some helpful sales people, I have found the answer!



I have been using Clinique take the day off cleansing balm. It's £20 for a tub and it lasts a very long time. It's a solid block or 'balm' that you rub your fingers across and then gently rub the wax into your skin. It dissolves hard-to-remove camouflage make-up and sunscreen too. Then I remove it gently with cotton wool like a normal cleanser. After that I wash my face to make sure it doesn't clog my easily-cloggable pores.

Although it is quite oily on the skin it doesn't leave your skin feeling greasy as long as you wash it off with water afterwards.

It isn't really suitable for removing eye make-up simply because it's hard to apply on your eyes.



For my eyes I have been using Lancome Bi Facil. This is quite gentle but you must make sure to hold it on the lashes to dissolve the make-up instead of scraping it off and irritating your eye area. I had burns around my eyes so I need something sensitive such as this. However, as it is quite a gentle removing action, it takes some time to get all make-up off successfully and some mornings I have had panda eyes!

If anyone has used something more effective on their eyes, do let me know!



When I first got my make-up I was so excited to use it, I couldn't wait to buy any remover. I hadn't realised just how resilient Dermablend was. I did discover that bio oil works really well if you have nothing else. It's just it's a bit expensive to be smearing liberally over your face as cleanser!

I have my official make-up lesson today so I will share any illuminating information I discover.....

'The Rash'

It's like a title from a bad horror movie. 'The rash' appeared impetigo-like about a week after my graft procedure. 7 days after the skin graft, once it was confirmed as 'taken,' the nurse insisted I put a tubi-grip on it to flatten it out. This was quite horrific. My arm looked like a shark-attack and I was to roll the tight tubi-grip down three times a day and massage the graft, stitches and all.

The skin was so delicate and during one rolling down of the tubi grip, a little bit came away. I'm talking the tiniest smidgeon, about the size of my little fingernail.

Very quickly, I developed the rash.

Initially it was yellow and quite scabby. It slowly transformed to bright dotty red, flaky, scaly, little spots that burst and now it is something between the three. I have now had it...wait for it...two and a half months!

I have had various diagnosis's such as Impetigo, Herpes, Thrush...the list goes on.

I have used 6 topical solutions but I've had to stop using them as they break the skin down where it's so sensitive. I have also had 2 lots of the antibiotic flucloxacillin and a course of fluconazole. I've tried washes such as Dermol.

I have had 2 swabs which have come back as normal. The only thing present is Staphylococcus aureus. The nurses say this is not something they treat as it is normal to have Staph present on the skin. Unchecked though, it can cause a whole host of issues. (Last comment due to self diagnosis on Internet. Not always reliable.) So I am not sure if it really is o.k to just leave, especially as it is still a bit crusty.

My housemate has named the rash 'irritus anonymitus.'

The most irritating thing about it is that it nearly stopped me from being able to wear my compression vest. I don't REALLY want to wear it as you know but the sooner I can wear it the better the results.

I am hoping that my body fights back whatever this rash is as my immune system picks up. Since the accident I have been pretty run down, culminating in a seriously unpleasant urinary tract infection last week.

I have looked into acupuncture and am hoping to have treatment in the next 2 or 3 weeks. The acupuncturist has come highly recommended and has suggested that I will need 3 sessions of 45 minutes each.

At this point I am willing to try anything, even if it is, as some really 'helpful' people told me; 'simply a placebo effect and it's a shame to hand money over to a bunch of charlatans!'

If anyone has any positive help or advice or has experienced something similar after surgery or a burn injury please do let me know! I am a bit of a wimp these days though, so please don't post any scary or gory comments. They will be deleted with one eye shut!!!

Dehydration - a side effect of a burn injury

Immediately after the accident I was given plenty of fluids intravenously. Severe or widespread burns can cause loss of body fluid as the skin has been breached and simply can't keep it in anymore.

The first days in the hospital I was constantly thirsty. It was the sort of thirst you get after drinking way too much red wine the night before and your body and mouth feels parched.

However, once I got back on my feet I did think that the dehydration was something that would quickly pass. Today, the accident was exactly three months ago and I am still dehydrated!

For those of you recovering from an injury like this, do make sure you drink plenty. I have found it's better to drink consistently instead of a whole lot of water at once. This is probably because the body is not retaining the water as it should and it slowly gets lost, needing constant top-up.

I did have a day where I didn't drink much and I paid the price by developing Cystitus overnight. I couldn't salvage the situation and it started to travel up my kidneys, resulting in pain, fever, an emergency trip to the Doctors and more antibiotics!

I don't know how long this phase will last. I have to avoid too much caffeine and pretty much no alcohol. I had a glass of wine the other night (what a luxury!) and I could feel the liquids almost seeping out of me! I was dehydrated immediately and spent the rest of the night hoovering up water.

If you have noticed this or experienced this yourself, do let me know. It would be great to get an indication of how long this lasts. I guess it's different for each person but I just didn't expect to find this symptom enduring such a long hold over me.

Compression garments

The discovery

I had a couple of weeks where every time I went to the hospital, the nurse got out what I referred to as her list of doom. 'You need skin grafts now.' Boom! Number one on the list of doom. 'This will really hurt.' Boom! 'Afterwards we will measure you for your compression garment.'

I had no idea what this compression garment was, as no one had mentioned it yet. So I regarded the child-size one she brought out to show me with something akin to aloofness. What did this have to do with me?

As she began to explain the purpose of the compression vest, it began to sink in.

It's my exact measurements.
It's tight.
Really tight.
I have to wear it for 23 hours a day.
I have to wear it for up to 2 years. When I will be nearly 30 years old.

It has a little collar.

Did I mention...it's really, really tight?

The reality

Here is my compression vest.



It's taken me a long time to get around to wearing it as I've had a rash around my grafts for 2 months. Nothing has worked on it so I'm going to try acupuncture in the next few weeks. Eventually, the physio told me that not wearing the vest was going to be detrimental to my scarring, so I am wearing it and hoping it doesn't make the rash worse.

Actually, it's not that bad.

It's been 3 days so far and this is what I've decided.

It's not that visible under clothes really. In fact, it's more cosmetically acceptable than my red chest and neck.

My grafts feel quite 'safe' under it. Less vulnerable.

It is coming up to winter and I'm always cold anyway!

It is really tight once you put it back on but you do get used to it. It never gets comfortable but you adjust to tune it out.

I can take it off for special events or nights out if need be, as long as I put it back on to sleep in.

When I take it off to massage I can already feel the grafts and scarring flattening out. I am seriously pleased about this!

Everyone who I care about seems to accept it.

And the only true positive thing about it is....I can wear a proper bra over it!!!! I have had to wear strapless ones for three months as the straps seriously chafe my skin. All of a sudden I have a bust back in the place a bust should be and not halfway down my waist!

If you have to wear a compression vest, it is a horrible thing to be told. It is not sexy or glamourous and 2 years is a long time. But I promise you, if I can already feel the flattening in 3 days, it will be worth it in the long run.

I am aware that people reading this might have to wear facial compression masks or full body garments and might be thinking 'oh dear, this girl has no idea' but I can only face my own battle. I did see these type of compression garments when I was doing my research and I am aware of how lucky I am, lucky that mine is not visible under my clothes. I wish you all well. I think of Katie Piper, she was the model of patience and dignity when faced with her treatments. She looks amazing now thanks to her perseverance.

Wheels!

Thanks to a very knowledgeable friend, my car was jump started back to it's former glory last night.

I love driving but after my accident the thought of even turning the key in the ignition was too much.

When I came out of the hospital, my knuckles were white from gripping the dashboard. I could see accidents everywhere and I was very nervous. And I wasn't even driving!

This wasn't helped by my research on skin grafts. I discovered lots of people had grafts because they had car accidents. This really put me off!

Despite having an explosion related accident, I was nervous of all accidents. This is something that has faded a bit but I still struggle with seeing accidents everywhere. The other day a bike cycled past me at high speed and in my mind I saw it veering towards me. I just tell myself I'm being silly. Statistically, it's unlucky a bike will hit me. I've survived nearly 27 years without a bike hitting me, so why would it now?

Back to the point, I love driving. When I got my car it opened a whole new world to me. No more commuting across London for hours, no more carrying my school marking...in the last couple of weeks I've really missed it.

So it was time to get it running. I was actually amazed when it coughed back into life. It had been left upwards of 3 months and it is an old car. It coughed, it spluttered, the alarm went off (several times!) and eventually.....Polo was back.

Nutrition - you are what you eat.

One of the most important things I've had to consider is the food and vitamins I consume. Good nutrition is important in everyday life but even more so after sustaining a burns injury. I did lots of research and devoured my fill of advice. I read that a healthy, nutritious balanced diet was essential....but I already followed a healthy diet. Still, there had to be some tweaks to make sure I was covering all bases.

Here is some of the information I've gathered. Please be aware that it is from various resources on the web and I am not a Doctor. This is simply an amalgamation of knowledge. I have only included it if it is general good sense, I'm not into the far fetched!

Calorie intake

The hospital instructed me to eat roughly twice the amount of calories I should normally consume. As a relatively petite female this is about 1800 a day.

So 3600 is a lot!

Especially as these have to be the right calories. I had a lot of comments along the lines of 'ooh lucky you, you can eat whatever you like!' But no, there is no nutritional value in hoovering up a family box of Thorntons each night. (Although I did this a couple of times.)

Instead, I needed to focus on protein, fresh fruit and vegetables and complex carbohydrates. Plus lots of liquid!

One of my main concerns, vainly so, was the weight gain. But you don't need to worry too much about this, for a few reasons.

1) Your body is utilising the calories, so you shouldn't gain much weight. The hospital told me this and I was very disbelieving but I actually haven't gained a great deal. Maybe half a stone. So I bought some new jeans.

2) You must remember your body needs to recover. I keep forgetting this. Something I must remember myself! Be kind to your body, it's trying it's best for you.

So, ask your medical person how many calories and try to make it.

Protein

The body loses protein through wounds, so it is very important to consume lots of it. You mostly want lean protein really though, no point in clogging up your arteries too! Burnsurvivor.com has the following to say:

Protein requirements generally increase more than energy requirements and appear related to the amount of lean body mass. The body loses protein through wounds and because of this, the body has increased calorie needs for healing. However, the majority of increased protein requirements come from muscle breakdown for use in energy production. Providing an increased intake of protein does not stop this breakdown. Rather it provides the materials needed to synthesize lost tissue.

So, where will you get your protein?

• Meat, poultry, fish, shellfish and eggs
• Pulses, nuts and seeds
• Soya products and vegetable protein foods

Normally you are advised to eat 2 to 3 servings a day according to BBC Health. A serving could be:

• 100g boneless meat (eg lean beef, lamb or pork)
• 100g boneless poultry (eg chicken or turkey breast)
• 100g fish (eg salmon, sardines or tuna)
• 2 medium eggs
• 3 tablespoons of seeds (eg sunflower or pumpkin seeds)
• 3 tablespoons of nuts (eg almonds or walnuts)

I made sure I ate protein with every meal during the first 2.5 months. I ate a lot of omelettes! Just be aware that if you are on a lot of painkillers and are suffering from a sluggish digestive system as a result, eggs might not be for you as they can stuff you up further!

Tinned or fresh oily fish is also a good idea. It is cheaper than buying lots of meat and seafood which can really set you back. You also get Omega-3 in oily fish which is very good for your skin.

Carbohydrates

Carbohydrates are an ideal source of energy for your healing body. They are converted more readily into glucose than proteins and this glucose can be used for energy.

There are good carbs and not-so-good carbs. These are known as 'simple' and 'complex' carbs. Without getting into a nutritional mire, this basically splits into two types of foods. 'Simple,' also know as 'refined' are things like white bread, flour, pasta, pizza dough, biscuits and so on. It doesn't take a brain surgeon to know this isn't the best route. 'Complex' or 'unrefined' are better for you as they are more natural. BBC health suggests:

Most people get their whole grain from wholemeal bread or whole grain breakfast cereals such as porridge, muesli or whole wheat cereals. Choose a whole grain variety over processed or refined grains, and look out for added sugar or salt.

Other whole grain foods include:

• Brown rice
• Whole barley
• Rye bread
• Rye crackers
• Oatcakes
• Popcorn

Remember though, you need to eat plenty. So if you don't fancy the complex carbs, then eat what you fancy at least. For a long time I felt quite sick, so I ate lots of things that wouldn't be considered perfect nutrition!

Fruit and Vegetables

These are always a good idea! You should be eating lots of brightly coloured fruits and vegetables and lots of them! This will help you take in lots of vitamin C. I did focus on those I particularly like anyway such as avocados, sweet potatoes and berries. They are full of antioxidants and good for the skin.

Eat your five a day at least. Remember, a portion size can differ depending what it is but you can normally check the packet these days. Go for a small handful portion if not sure!

Vitamins

Now, there are probably millions of vitamins you need but these are the ones the hospital told me about.

Zinc - needed to help rebuild the damaged cells, process your protein and carbohydrates and boost your immune system. You can overdose on Zinc which can make food taste funny, so don't overdo it and consult your medical practitioner.

Vitamin C - Helps new tissue growth. Aids healing. You can't really overdose as the body excretes excess but if you take too much it might upset your stomach. Follow guidelines on packet.

Vitamin E - Promotes healing. Can be used topically too once skin has healed. You can take too much (very high doses) so check guidelines.

I would take an all-round multivitamin too.

There is plenty of information regarding nutrition for burns injuries and this is just a summary of all the research I did. Eating well is important anyway but after this type of injury you must make sure you are supporting your body by eating enough calories and choosing the right things.

Woof!

Dog's are a man's best friend. TRUE.

Meet my Mum's gorgeous dog. He gave me company and unconditional love despite having my arm in a giant cast and smelling slightly off the first 2 months or so. He didn't mind that I was moody, or tired, or stroppy, or angry. He just came and gave me another cuddle. (He sometimes smells slightly off too.)

I love the sun; it no longer loves me.

Yes, this is me. I may be of fair English heritage but I love the sun. I've always been careful in the sun (factor 30-50 depending on location) but I do love to sunbathe. Unfortunately, this is something I have to give up.

I counteract this depressing fact with the thought that come 50 years of age, I will look 10 years younger than all my peers.

Initially, I have to be EXTREMELY careful in the sun.

As the nurse said to me...if I catch the sun, even the winter sun, my skin could hyperpigment and I could be left with brown patches on my skin. Her exact, bone-chilling prophecy was 'if this happens, there's nothing we can do for you.'

Added to the aesthetically hideous threat of brown patches is the fear of blistering in the sun. I have been warned that because my skin is damaged, it could blister in heat.

I'm not sure what level of sun or even 'winter' sun I would be able to withstand. So I am not taking any risks. I do plan to go on holiday next year...somewhere hot and beautiful....but I will be planning for it as though I were a hyper-sun-sensitive-red-headed-freckled-pale-faced-English-person. Or, a person with a burns injury.

1) UV parasols. I bought a UV parasol from EBAY.



UV parasols are still very popular in Japan and have featured throughout their history.

As pale, flawless skin has always been treasured in Japan, UV parasols have always been important. The Geisha, with their white face, highlights this dedication to pale skin. Although the parasols have a function to serve, they also are very pretty.



Thanks to the wonder that is EBAY, you can choose from a range of parasol design.



And yes, people do look at you. But that's because they suffer from something else. Ignorance.

I love the heart shaped one above from http://www.umbrellaheaven.com

Sun-cream

Although I feel safer under an umbrella at the moment, I am also going to be lathering myself in factor 50+. Even in the equally threatening 'winter sun!' It is only my face and ear that I am exposing at the moment but as I continue to heal and expose more flesh (!) I will have to use it in greater quantities and might have to opt for a cheaper one. Right now though, my skin is sensitive so it is treated as though it belongs to Cleopatra!

The sun cream I use at the moment is by La Roche Posay 50+ and is very gentle. I chose the 'fluid' version which is like a milk and sinks in very easily. For someone who had sensitive and spot prone skin pre-burn, you can imagine how gentle the products I use need to be. It can bought from Boots and is around £15 for 30ml.

http://www.laroche-posay.co.uk/topics/specific-treatments/For-sensitive-or-sun-allergy-prone-skin-t129.aspx



UV T-Shirts

The last thing that I will get for my holiday next year is a UV T-shirt. As my burns are all upper body, I will be able to wear this in the pool over my bikini. (I can take it off once safety under an umbrella. I am still quite vain!) This means that, teamed with a big hat, I can still go in the sea or in the pool.

If you have a burn then there is no reason you shouldn't enjoy yourself (I don't think) but you need to be very responsible (sigh) and think of all the things that could make you uncomfortable for cause problems. For me, having this level of control is comforting. It makes me feel like I can handle situations, as I have prepared myself for every eventuality.

http://www.sun-togs.co.uk/catalog/125

Sun togs does a women's and men's range. They don't come cheap! If anyone has bought these and has a better source, please let me know!!!